These parents tweeting about their little sugar plums is all you need to read today to kick start your week.
It's always fun to hear about kids' new adventures but hearing it from parents' point of view makes the stories even more hilarious. Here we have combined 13 funniest tweets from parents about their kids that all of you might relate.
5-year-old: I'm going to be so good tomorrow.— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) March 1, 2020
Me: What about today?
5: I have plans.
Being the only butt wiper you child deems acceptable is both an honor and a curse.— Rhyming Mama (@sarabellab123) March 5, 2020
Me: Want anything special at the grocery store?— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) March 1, 2020
Me: Any snacks?
Me: Anything you want for dinners?
[1 day later]
Child [rifling through cabinets]: We never have anything to eat.
Me: why are your socks wet?— Marcy G 🍕 (@BunAndLeggings) March 5, 2020
Toddler: sorry mommy
Me: WHY ARE YOUR SOCKS WET?
Me: WHY ARE THEY WET?
Toddler: I love you mommy
This is not good
My favourite thing about watching movies with my 4YO is how she talks the entire time, then asks to pause it while she pees, so she doesn’t miss anything.— Megan Rikas (@MegsHAUSTED) March 5, 2020
if my kids are ever called to testify against me, there are two equally likely scenerios— Pats O' Tweetin ☘️ (@PatsATweetin) March 4, 2020
-they detail my crime in excruciating detail
-they incorrectly describe the plot of an episode of scooby doo
“We don’t wear what we slept in out in public.”— AsKateWouldHaveIt (@KateWouldHaveIt) March 3, 2020
-Me, lying to my child
6: Mom will you play with me?— That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) March 2, 2020
Me: Sure buddy
6: Yay! Okay you can sit right there, you don’t even have to get up!
Me: ʸᵒᵘ’ʳᵉ ᵐʸ ᶠᵃᵛᵒʳᶦᵗᵉ ᵏᶦᵈ
Sometimes I get the feeling that my family doesn’t really care about learning my fun facts.— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) March 1, 2020
Watching the dogs lick up the kids food from the floor is the closest I get to feeling like a Disney princess— Professional Worrier (@pro_worrier_) March 3, 2020
Someone asked me if I was concerned about getting the coronavirus.— Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) March 1, 2020
“I was exposed to the germs my kids brought home from Chuck E. Cheese birthday parties. You can’t scare me.”
My kids: [pretending to bake] Here are some cookies for you, Papa!— A Bearer Of Dad News (@HomeWithPeanut) March 2, 2020
Me: Aw, thanks guys-
My 4 year-old: We were going to throw them in the trash because they are gross but gave them to you instead.
Me: And there it is.
Me every day: You kids drive me insane. I need a break.— Arianna Bradford (@TheNYAMProject) March 5, 2020
Me before a kid-free trip: I CAN’T LEAVE MY LITTLE SUGAR PLUMS